What's your advice for George?




Readers Answer Your Relationship Questions

Readers answer your relationship questions. This week, George W. Bush needs advice on encountering an ex socially.

George says, "I really loved Tony. We had some great times together, he was a real romantic. But it was always hard managing a long distance relationship - I used to wonder if he was seeing other world leaders when he was home. He always said he wasn't, but sometimes I'd see pictures in the paper of him out with Jacques Chirac or Silvio Berlusconi. Then we'd fight, and I'd be miserable.

"The only public hint of our relationship slipped out one day when we were talking to reporters at Camp David. They asked if we had any interests in common. I giggled and said, 'Well, we both use Colgate toothpaste.' Tony was annoyed, but said lightly, 'They're going to wonder how you knew that, George!'

"Still, I always thought we'd work things out - we had a 'special relationship', a 'unique bond'. But one day Tony found out that I'd told [Mexican President] Vicente Fox that we had an 'unprecedented closeness', and he got really mad.

'This was one phonecall I stood up for', says Dubya."That night, he called me. I could tell rightaway that it wasn't going to be a slushy or sexy phonecall, the kind he used to make just before going to bed. This was one phonecall I stood up for.

"He told me it was over.

"I cried myself to sleep listening to our song, "Everything I do, I do for you". The next day, the evil men attacked our country, and I knew this was only going to make our break-up harder.

"He knew, and I knew, that it would have seemed odd if he didn't call me straight away, but it was really hard on both of us. Only a very few people knew of our relationship, and even they didn't know we'd broken up.

"Tony flew over to offer his support. When I saw him, my arms ached to hold him, but I knew that if I wanted a chance to win him back, I had to appear strong.

"We've been together so often since. My heart aches when I think about how much fun we could have had if we were still going out. As it is, I'm distracted whenever he's around. I accidentally agreed to bomb Afghanistan because I was thinking about his cute little smile instead of listening to my advisors.

"I just can't stop thinking about him, and I can't bear that we keep bumping into each other at world leader social functions. I have to get over him before I slip up and bomb another country, but I don't know how."